One of the more persistent ideas that circulate is that our physical world, otherwise known as Mother Earth, is stable and largely unchangeable. We believe that and that it has been the way that it is for a very long time in the past and is going to stay the way that it is for an equally long time in to the future. We have this vague idea that the seasons and general climate will keep on going around in much the same way as they are at present and that tomorrow things will be pretty much they way they were yesterday.

We hold on to this idea despite the large volume of evidence, both scientific and mythological, to the complete contrary. An enormous amount of what we like to think of as hard scientific evidence that tells us in no uncertain terms that the polarity of Mother Earth has changed several times. Scientists have been able to demonstrate that right now there are sweeping changing taking place in the magnetic field of Mother Earth and no one is quite sure of what the effects of this are going to be.

There is hard scientific evidence to support the theory that our polar regions have not always been where they are now. In other words the earth has, in the past, shifted quite violently on its axis. The most recent one took place just beyond historic memory. The evidence for this, together with a lot of other stuff, lies in the discovery of woolly mammoths in what are now the northern polar or semi-polar regions of the earth. They were found with mouthfuls of quick frozen, half chewed, tropical plants. It is quite obvious that they were woolly not because it was it was cold where they lived but because it was hot.  One of these mammoths provided the main course for a banquet in London towards the end of the 19th century. That is how fresh the meat still was. These very large mammals were obviously moved very rapidly indeed from the tropics to the poles or rather, the tropics where they were living very rapidly became polar! The evidence for sudden and catastrophic shifts of this kind also litters the mythology of many groups of people in many different parts of the planet. We should remember that our mythology has very deep and secure roots in facts of one kind or another.

Is Psalm 82.5 we can read:
“They walk on in darkness: all the foundations of the earth are out of course”

An ancient Egyptian papyrus known as ‘Ipuwer’ says in one place:
“The earth turned over like a potter wheel” and also “The earth is upside down”

In the Icelandic Edda called ‘Voluspa’ it is written:
“The sun had no knowledge of where her home should be, the moon knew not what was his; the stars knew not what their stations were….”

The Mayan legends speak of a time when:
“It was not known where the new sun would appear. They looked in all directions. Some looked to the north”

The Aztecs relate that their ancients laid wagers as to where the sun would appear again - apparently after an event of huge magnitude:
“they were all proven wrong for not one of them had fixed upon the east”

There is a wonderful aspect to all these myths and facts. There can be little quarrel with fact that in the past there have been convulsive events that have had drastic effects on our planet. These appear to have ranged from meteor impact to massive flooding and, for some reason or another, having the planet swing wildly on its axis so that what was once equatorial becomes polar. As these events – so far – have all happened outside the range of living memory we can only speculate about the effect that any one of these events had on living conditions at the time. There seems to be no doubt that times became very hard for whatever survived. Living through an ice age cannot have been as much fun as living on a warm seashore. The myths confirm this and speak of great disasters and times of great tribulation. The scientific record imprinted into the rocks of the planet, confirm the accuracy of this mythology again and again. Despite all this hardship, a myriad other life forms as well as us, not only survived – we all flourished! Mother Nature herself does not seem to done too badly either. Today there seems to be an accumulation of evidence to indicate that some similar event or series of events is fairly imminent. Our mythology also points very strongly indeed towards these coming events.

So where are we today? There is no doubt that something is afoot in our environment. In our usual meddlesome way we seem to be pushing the process to some sort of crisis point with our destruction of the ozone layer, green house gasses, forest destruction, ocean pollution and the rest. The polar ice caps are retreating and there have recently been pictures on the news of the ice breaking up at the North Pole itself. There is more than enough evidence to suggest that the planet is getting warmer and there is therefore going to be an awful lot more water in our oceans. In terms of past experience this is likely to mean that there will be another ice age as a result of all this. Quite simply, it seems, the weight distribution will change and then so might the earth’s axis.

There will no doubt be a price to pay as Mother Nature scratches the lice that are currently irritating her, and, as has happened in the past, many lives will no doubt be lost. However the wondrous thing is that it is simply not possible to kill people. It is only possible to kill bodies. And it is, after all, quite fun making new ones!

So where does all this leave us? Must we sit back and wait for the apparently inevitable? There are three powerful and very optimistic messages in the present situation:

First. Some kind of change is inevitable and it seems to be imminent. Organisms – of any kind - are NOT stable. All of them are  bron in some way or another and all them die in one way or another. Implicit in the act of creation is the application of change.
Second. We have an innate ability to survive change as we have already done many times. However this innate ability is not licence for us to sit back complacently. We had better get busy.
Third. Just as we have the ability to hasten and exacerbate the process, then we surely also have the ability to slow down and ameliorate the process and maybe even stop it.

For so long as we leave it all up to government or the so-called authorities it is likely that not a great deal will happen. There will be much hand wringing and pontificating and passing of well-intentioned resolutions and things will pretty much go on as before. If serious things are going to happen then it starts, as always, with us.

Here are some questions for you:

1. Do you walk lightly on the planet?
2. Do you leave only footprints when you go into the wild?
3. Do you cultivate an awareness of what is actually going on around you?
4. Do you know what birds and animals live in your garden?
5. Do you know the names of the trees and plants in your garden?
6. Do you sort your trash for recycling?
7. Do you take care with water?
8. Do you use unleaded fuel?
9. Do you know yourself?
10. What are you doing about all of the above?

Can you imagine what the effect might be if perhaps at least a significant number of people on the planet simply operated with these ten points always in their consciousness?

1. Life has no interest in you failing and will not confront you with something you cannot deal with.
2. Life is not meant to be easy. Paradise is very boring. We enjoy the complications.
3. Experience is the ultimate teacher. Time to get up and do something.
4. Change is simple – Change your Mind and change your results
5. Change is not easy to maintain and will require support and the learning of new techniques
6. Most of what you have been taught does not work that well
7. Happiness is the road not a destination.
8. Love is the result of our actions and not the cause of anything.
9. Without Love what is the point?
10. The only difference between our business and personal life is one of degree

WHEN ABUSE IS NOT ABUSE

Hmmm and obviously this is the way it was meant to come out – so that we have to do it via writing. All survivors come to the crash and burn point – and then survive it. Literally “to live above or beyond”.

There is a very important point here that during the childhood years you saw nothing really wrong in what was going on and looked at from a purely logical point of view what was wrong with it? The custom of the child bride is worldwide. Still today we worship the pre-pubescent body. Our women must be hairless and smooth all over and even the male homosexual falls into this trap. None of our adult odours are acceptable. More than odd, it is downright peculiar!

Also be careful of condemning what you call the “whore principal”. There is nothing wrong with the whore except in so far as we make it wrong. In many previous times the whore was an integral part of society and the story of the “temple prostitute “is well known. Despite the best efforts of the church to denigrate and down play their role, those women were honoured members of society and were educated to a degree far beyond that offered to the ordinary girl. It can be argued with some force that even today a great number of women operate with this principal as they set out “catch their man” and succeed in making a “good catch”. Even female apes – our closest cousins - offer themselves in return for protection and other treats. It appears to be part of the female manipulative bag of tricks. Get away from the myth of the “innocence” of the child. Innocent we are not. We lack practical experience and this does not by the wildest stretch of the imagination make us innocent. We are both cunning and manipulative to a degree. We have to be for our survival. The way in which we manipulate our parents is really quite shocking and quite amoral. Please note, not “immoral”,”amoral”! We will do anything to survive. We will even tell them at a very young age that “I love you” when there is not the slightest chance whatsoever that we have the faintest idea of what that actually means (do we EVER!!??). What we do know is that they like it and it gets us a very pleasant result indeed – usually. Know this.  Those people took nothing from you. It was - especially as we approach the higher or next level of our development -  only when you started to approach the age of puberty and you in all innocence i.e. without a full realisation of the possible consequences - took a stand, and said “Enough!” as we are fully entitled to do about anything, that the shit the hit the fan. The real disaster was your parent’s reaction. It was they who made you feel dirty and all the rest. Until that time you had NOT been doing anything either dirty or wrong.

Quite what your grandfather, poor sod, was living with must have been indescribable. And that does not make what he did acceptable any more than it is acceptable to drink a bottle of brandy a day or indulge any other excessive appetite. There are few if any problem children and many, many problem parents for all the reasons we have discussed many times. Ignorance and laziness being the main ones. Ignorance because we have no idea of what it means to be a human being, simply because nobody ever took the trouble to teach us, and laziness because very, very few of us make even just a tiny little effort to find out what it is all about. I wonder what your grandfather went through in HIS childhood for truly the sins of the father are visited on the sons. Wish him in Hell? You have better things to do with your energy than attempting to push him there. He will have done that quite well all on his own without needing any assistance from you! Again not because of what he did but because he went against your free will and this we may never do without paying a huge price.

With your own level of ignorance – your parents taught you squat – what chance did you have except to follow the path you have – so far? And now it is time to change direction. What your grandfather did is almost irrelevant and it can be argued with some force that you are who you because of what he did!  Again this does not make it acceptable. The real monsters in the cupboard are those who failed in their manifest duty to support your taking a stand at the Sunday lunch table.

The memories will always be there and you can draw strength from them. They have contributed in no small measure to who you are. The power is always in the dark. The hook that you are on is your own. Time to get off it and “let the dead bury the dead”. You need no Hail Mary’s from me. Abyss? Good god girl that is no option for one as fine as you! To continue looking at the events of your life as awful or evil is you writing off your life and you simply may not do that without there being a huge price. Could you have gotten to where you are by some other route and not this one? Perhaps and you chose not to. Enough.

Hi Christopher

To start at the beginning and this is a very dusty box. At the age of around 3 my grandparents used to come over for Sunday lunches and afterwards a lie down was indicated with Gramps. From cuddling this progressed to touching and then fondling and his release. How insidious when the message is supposedly “love’. This went on for a period of 9 years, It was ‘our secret’ for which I was compensated with comics, sweets, and so much extra attention from this ‘loving’ relative.  Our close relationship was often commented on as being so special..One of my earliest memories came back to me of having my hands soiled by this man’s passion and that is why to this day I hate getting my hands dirty, even through handling food or the soil. A dramatic and not pleasant recollection. This went on until I started maturing and he desired more so I promptly manifested acute appendicitis on the anticipated due date of consummation. After that it was a cat and mouse game with just a little being offered for the payments received. Of course being violated of innocence made me a very aware little girl and 2 or 3 other male sods along the way picked up on this and also tried their input in various ways. The very sad thing is that I did not really think it was wrong at all and as long as I was  getting what I wanted out of it so what, the whore principal. One day, a Sunday, the family were all having lunch and my dad was carving the chicken, I said loudly and clearly that I was not going to lie down after lunch as I did not want Gramps to touch me any more!! Well, I do remember seeing the chicken fly through the air with huge force and after that it is a blank save a lot of loud yelling. I was sent to my room.
My mother came in later and told me I was a liar and a trouble maker and her father would never do anything like that. I was ungrateful and did not deserve all the nice things he did and gave me.
Shortly after that my grandparents left Johannesburg and moved to a farm.

For some weird reason my parents planned to move here too and I was put into boarding school. I then proceeded to put on 15 kg in 1 term as I would then be fat and thus unattractive to the male sex. As my folks were still in Johannesburg I had to go to the farm for the first holiday. There was no running water and I was washing my hair in a tin bath with a pot ladling the water over myself when he came up behind me and pressed himself against me and said he could do what he liked now, as no one would believe me anyway. And he liked my new curves. I rounded on him as if I was a banshee, screamed my head off and told him if he ever touched me again I would kill him! There was no doubt in my mind or his that I was deadly serious. This was the end of the line. I refused to ever go there again. I did not attend his funeral.
As he had always said to me, I would look after him, see to his perverse wishes if I loved him I vowed that day to look after his three women, my gran, aunt and mother, as a defiant mandate of care, but I would see him in hell.

What followed were very unhappy teenage year’s , a  period of doubt, overweight, drinking, promiscuity, and always the feeling of having to keep separate in case anyone found out what a whore I was. I had many boyfriends none of whom actually meant anything, as I never allowed total closeness other than physical.

When I was 21 I met a man whom I married and the rest is History.

Well that’s my sad little saga, finally out in print, after two vomits and one cup of tea. I remember you telling the one lass that was on Chalice when I assisted that she had let 3 minutes, not even, of a rape by a cousin affect her whole life. Well guess what? I have done the same, but I really now want to move forward without these memories lurking like dark shadows to ambush me every now and then.

Talk to me.

Business is crazy……
I cannot help but be reminded of the old Chinese curse “May you live in interesting times”. Well that we most certainly are – including it seems, the Chinese.
There is no doubt that Business is really taking some hard knocks. I see from the msnbc headlines that I get each day; another giant is going to the wall. Nortel has applied for bankruptcy protection. The other d ay I read that Barclays was going to lay off “1000’s”. The list is very, very long indeed and more than little depressing. Getting rid of staff (interesting word that - it means “support” in one way or another) is one of the traditional remedies that business has always followed. When it gets tough, business goes about the busyness of getting rid of what it has, until then, been calling its “greatest asset” (is there a CEO on the planet that does not say that, sometime, somewhere?) – it’s people. People are “fired” and there are people out there who make a very good living making sure that this is done as cheaply as is possible – always, of course, sticking strictly to the letter of the law! The great pundit Mr Jack Welch is on record as saying that at any given time some 10% of the workforce is not making that much contribution to the bottom line so they can safely be gotten rid of - fired. So when you have gotten rid of one lot of 10% you can presumably wait a little and then get rid of the next 10% - and so on - until you have no one left? Or must you hire again in the interim so that the 10% is always there?
These times are going to require different solutions and for so long as we do things the same old way we will get the same old result. This is insane and we are seeing the results of this insanity every day!
Nobody really knows for sure and there is a suggestion that the phrase “to be fired” was, once upon a time, a literal event. When your village, tribe or community was fed up with you for some reason or another, they drove you out of the community and “fired” your home – set fire to everything you owned. You were deprived of your means of livelihood. Drastic but simple and on the face of it effective. The community got rid of the irritation. The person concerned must have left in despair and bitterness - and likely led the next raiding party as it swept into the valley seeking revenge. An empty belly does not prompt a reasonable response. And the cycle is perpetuated. It is rather akin to amputating an arm because it fails to throw the ball where you want it to go. Insane.
Right now we are seeing similar insanity. Business is not doing business – or least not as much as it would like. So it “fires” people and these people are going back into society resentful, bitter, angry and will not be very good customers for whatever business business wants to do. Simply put. Business cannot do healthy business in an unhealthy society and this is precisely what business is busy creating – a very unhealthy society indeed. We see the pit looming and promptly get out the shovels to dig it deeper.
Is there another way? There always is and it is not always going to be the easy way. Rather than cutting the limb off because it does not behave the way we want it to why not do something about making the limb more efficient? Is there not a way of making the staff, in which considerable amounts of time effort and money have already been invested, more productive and more of a support?
Our staffs are business’s biggest asset and support system. Right now business needs to be investing even more in them to make them more productive and more efficient and better customers.
Want to engage in a conversation as to how? Drop us a line at cnevill@foundationsa.co.za and let us see what we can come up with. I believe it can be done and we will have to be bold - very bold.

Tolle concerns himself a great deal with what he calls the Ego and has some very interesting and also valuable comments on this aspect of our psyche. However he appears to fall into the trap of making the Ego if not the only, certainly the main source of our ills as a species and something that must be done away with in some way or another. For me it is difficult to envisage anything that is so much part of us, whether it be Ego or Anger or Fear – and all these indubitably are very much part of us – as in any way bad or something to be gotten rid of. What we surely need to look at is the way in which we deal with or manage these energies. All are part of the skill set we are given and therefore presumably need for our existence here in the physical plane and we will surely diminish ourselves in some way if we do in fact succeed in actually eliminating them. Tolle says at page 78 that “ego and awareness are incompatible”. There is a problem with this statement because as soon as you say this you create an arena in which Ego and Awareness are now antagonists with Ego being, in some way or another, in conflict with Awareness - and vice versa of course. According to Tolle it seems that as we become more aware then Ego will somehow vanish. Would anyone argue with the idea that it appears that we do not have to be taught how to have an Ego or to be Angry or Fearful? These are part of us. What is not part of us and what we DO have to be taught is how to be loving, kind, gentle, empathetic and the rest!
What we should rather be looking at is the reality that for anything to be strong it needs – yes needs – something to counter, to strive against. Jesus was in (according to the Gospels) in pretty much continual “war” with the Devil or Evil and spent quite a lot of His time “driving it out” in one way or another. Buddha was always aware of and seeking to “put down” or “contain” the self or ego. It is precisely this PROCESS of wrestling that gives form and existence to what we call Life. Victory or elimination of either one cannot be the aim or desire. The problem that we are faced with is not the elimination of the Ego. In that direction lies true insanity for we will destroy the very alembic within which the process of Life itself takes place, but rather to learn to live with and manage – not control - it. This requires great Awareness. Awareness and Ego can rather be seen as engaged in some amazing and wonderful dance rather than a conflict.
In the desert Jesus neither destroyed Satan, nor did He ask his Father to, though presumably either one of these actions would have been well within his ability and available to Him. He put him behind him where presumably he remains to this day as His shadow. Something that throws no shadow is in either perpetual darkness or has no real existence.
If we go back to the idea that I have expressed elsewhere that we are essentially schizophrenic in nature – with the Being on the one hand and the Human on the either and that the relationship between these two is at best an uneasy alliance, that both wrestle with – the dance I referred to above - then what Tolle calls the Ego is actually the energy created by this relationship. When two things get together in a relationship a third thing comes into existence and that is the Relationship or, in this case, what we can call the Ego. It is this PROCESS of learning to accommodate and live within the Relationship of Human to Being that is the very stuff of Life itself. Our problem is not the existence of the Ego – this is both vitally necessary and the inevitable result of the process of incarnation or birth – but rather our lack of Awareness on what is actually taking place when we arrive here via the birth process and our resultant lack of skill in managing the situation in which we find ourselves as the composite or meld that we call a “Human Being”.
We can only theorise as to why this extraordinary relationship between the Being – the god-nature – and the Human, or animal-nature came into existence at all. There are however some useful pointers in our mythology. We can look primarily at the Graeco-Roman myths simply because these are the most easily accessible, though there is a golden thread that connects the myths of all origins.
Perhaps the most striking aspect of the gods of myth – and these are the archetypes to whom we relate – is that they are simply not friendly and anything but well disposed to one another. At best their relationships with each other can be described as fractious. They are most decidedly not characterised by the qualities of Love, Gentleness, Kindness, Friendship, Compassion – it is quite a long list - that we say we value. If we look at the mythology that has been handed down to us most of the time, what we call the gods, appear to be at war with one another or at best in uneasy alliances and quite willing to, sometimes literally, stab each other in the back on very slight provocation. There is a quite remarkable absence of the qualities that I mentioned earlier. What there most decidedly is, is a fierce individualism and a drive to realise and give effect to the Self –can we say Ego? They really do not seem to have too much time for one another. The whole idea of relationship as we understand it and demand from one another is largely foreign to the gods of our mythology. Paradoxically we admire the fierce individualism and other egotistical characteristics the gods epitomise and call forth.
It seems that we must look to our Human or Animal side for the other characteristics that we admire. From what we can gather of our evolutionary past there seems to little doubt that we would simply not have survived had we not learnt to live in groups. Perhaps because of the animal heritage of having to cooperate for our very survival what has come down to us from our Human side is the caring, gentleness, kindness, companionship, sharing, empathy, cooperation, caring – in fact all the characteristics that we sum up with that word numinous Love.
The power of the Human Being lies in the ability that we must apparently learn and that is to meld the fierce individualism or Ego of the Being with the Love of the Human. It is in the combination that our real Divinity lies and it is here that our challenge lies. To do away with either will not serve. Awareness of the vast wonderful, exciting, painful, magical process that we are engaged with is the key and the creation of this Awareness is that first challenge that we must all undertake. This is Life.

For so long as we see God, Allah, Jehovah, Brahma,Life – call it what you will – as somehow separate from us, a No-thing, that we have to work hard at having a relationship with, we make a mock of the concept that we have thrust at us on a daily basis – THAT GOD ( and all the other words that we use) IS PART OF US AND WE ARE PART OF GOD. If I am part of that God and that god is part of me, then there is no separateness and therefore there can be no relationship to work on. What I do have to work at is simply expressing that divinity of which we are all a part and which is in each and every one of us. For so long as I feel that I have to work at the relationship with God then I deny the promise contained in the words of Jesus of Nazareth at John 10:34 “Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are Gods?” and again at 10:38 “that the Father is in me and I in him”.

We are surrounded at every level with the effects of this belief in the separateness of God/Life from us. The planet that is our home is rapidly becoming less and less habitable and less suitable to our purposes as heap abuse after abuse on Mother Nature. There is also more than a little evidence to suggest that the very fabric of our society is also beginning to unravel as we heap abuse after abuse on each other. I like to feel that we would not be doing to the planet what we are doing if we simply saw the planet as part of the same God/Life as we are. I like to feel that we would simply not treat those that look and believe different to us in the way that we do, if we saw them also, as part of the same God/Life as we are. Surely we would not be that stupid? A school boy who is just approaching puberty, came back to his parents, whom I know, in a state of shock after his teacher in Religious Studies had told him that a Buddhist Monk would surely burn in the Christian hell for his beliefs! It would seem we are that stupid!

Is the answer too frightening for the Churches? – and I am also speaking of the Jewish and the Muslim “churches” though I am very aware they do not have the same formality of structure as the Christians. Are they afraid that if we actually realised that we all have to do is be the divinity that we already are, then a great deal of the structure that they have created would become obsolete and unnecessary? The way for us to realise – make real - that divinity would be through us and our own introspection and effort and not because of the interference of any outside agency. Do they fear that this would then make them superfluous? Would it really? Perhaps all they would need to do is change their roles in our lives. Priest, Rabbis, Mullahs would then rather become facilitators to support us in calling forth what is already latent in us rather than attempting to beat us into the shape they feel is required by some dogma or another. This is the real meaning of the word education – to call forth. And is this not what God wants? For us to simply “ be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” (Marianne Williamson)

We talk often about the alchemical process that is life so it might be well to examine what we mean when we talk of Alchemy. Usually it is associated with old men with long beards in mysterious book-filled laboratories, surrounded by strange equipment and very busy trying to turn lead into gold. Likely with an owl as the symbol of wisdom perched somewhere in the background. This, sadly, has lead to alchemy being discredited as something more than a little off the wall and not to be taken too seriously.

This is a pity because Alchemy is where modern chemistry has its roots and it is safe to say that without the learning and discoveries of those early alchemists we would not have chemistry today. In fact we could go even further and say that despite the wonders that modern chemistry is capable of, alchemy can be regarded as superior in many ways. One thing that chemistry does not take into account and it is today being recognised as a vital factor in the world of quantum physics and that is the actual physical presence of the chemist. Alchemists recognised fully the importance of the environment in any reaction – and that included the nature, temperament and state of personal development of the alchemist. Perhaps if more recognition were given this today, we would not have so many chemicals that can only be called bad! The old alchemists, would I suspect, be appalled at some of the stuff coming out of our modern laboratories. We have fallen into a most dangerous and seductive trap – because, as human beings, we CAN do something, we believe that we MAY.

The word alchemy has an interesting etymology. It is Arabic in origin as one expect as the science has come down to us via Arab scholars. The prefix “Al” meaning simply “of” or “from”. The “chem” part is an ancient Egyptian word – predating the Arabic that is spoken in that country today - and means “the black land”. This is a reference to the annual flooding that took place when the Nile deposited quantities of the life-giving black mud that it brought down from central Africa. This was a truly transformative process that brought life back to Egypt and allowed that country to achieve the pre-eminent position it held in ancient times. With the construction of the Aswan Dam this process no longer happens.

The operative word here is “transformative” and it is this process that so fascinated the alchemists. Did some of them concern themselves to attempting to turn lead into gold? No doubt and it is interesting that atomically there is not that much difference between lead and gold and they are often found in close association with each other. There is more than a little evidence to suggest that some of them may even have succeeded. Perhaps - and we need not bother ourselves here with the reality or otherwise of that – you could have a fascinating time exploring that aspect yourself. If you wish to pursue this I suggest you make a start with the works of a much misunderstood, intellectual giant of the Middle Ages, Paracelsus.

Certainly Paracelsus and other were fascinated by the straightforward chemical processes that could be set in motion by the combination of a variety of substances. This process resulted in the amazing appearance of totally new substances. Much as we do today in our hi-tech laboratories. What really interested the serious alchemist however was how this transformative process could be applied to the human psyche. It was this latter thinking that caught Dr. C. G. Jung’s attention and he devoted a great deal of time and intellectual energy to the unravelling of the language of ancient alchemical treatises into the language of modern psychology.

One of the most important pieces of equipment in the alchemist’s laboratory was the alembic. This was the container or still in which the chemical process were contained and took place. The operative word is “container” and just as no sensible process can take place in the laboratory without a suitable container or alembic so it is with our lives.

These days there is a lot of talk about the necessity of having definable goals and the validity of this cannot sensibly be disputed. Equally we all know that, too often, once we have achieved a goal it often no longer appears to have the value that it seemed when we set out. Why? We need to take the process of goal setting a step further. Unless the goals are contained in the alembic or the personal Vision we have for our lives then the goals we set will be neither satisfying nor useful for the simple reason that they are not truly relevant and therefore add little value to our lives.

This is one of the great challenges that face all of us. What is your alembic or to use a more modern term what is your Vision for your life?

Below is a letter I recently received from someone who has done my personal development work. I feel it outlines a very common issue that confronts all of us – both male and female – in our relationships and that is the matter of Trust and the matter of what we call the Truth. My reply to her is interleaved. I feel that what is written could serve a great number of people out there who are wrestling with their relationships. Feel free to comment!

Hi Christopher

How is Cape Town treating you and your family? I love the photo of your teacher on the latest newsletter!

It is rather nice! He is quite gorgeous.

I would have loved to now be sitting in front of you to discuss my life as it is now. You have been on my mind lately. I accept that we will not necessarily have it easier because of our awareness, but I find that the lows are much lower and the highs are wonderfully happy times.

Easy? I am not sure that I know the meaning of that word. Life is surely richer.

The summary of the love in my life:

I met THE MAN last year on a blind date. We immediately struck a chord with each other. He is in his forties, has never been married before and started talking love, marriage etc. before these entered my mind. My own experience so far caused me to be very careful and I guarded my heart carefully. I had a serious conversation with him relatively early in the relationship re my divorce reasons, religion and babies (one day). I wanted to prevent heartache to both if these were not agreeable issues or non-negotiable no’s in his life. He was quite prepared to accept these conditions and agree to some.

We moved in together earlier this year. Like any couple and any relationship, we’ve had our ups & downs, fights, etc. I don’t think he knows what to do with conflict or how to deal with it or see the positive aspect of conflict. He has mentioned that he realize he would need to do Harlequin & Chalice, and I do send him the dates.

Christopher, for the first time in my life, I am:

· Having wonderful sex (thanks to the 360 degree change in my opinion, perception, importance of sex in Chalice)

· Praying about a relationship

· Praying for my partner

· Respecting my partner

Now comes the crunch…….

The other day I had to check something on his PC and found some emails that were more than little suggestive addressed to another woman. I later found out that she’s recently divorced, just moved and in her 30’s. I pondered about these until the evening when we were in bed. He had known that something had been wrong the whole day and he then questioned me again. I confronted him with what I had found. He sees it as innocently flirting (he does have a very sexual sense of humour and can turn anything around to that in a very funny manner at a moment’s notice) and told me to not worry about it. Typically me – it is still eating at me and I feel very vulnerable. Why am I not the only one, why does somebody else awaken this (and I DO know that men have fantasies and am OK with that) and why does he ask these questions and were even prepared to answer some of hers? A physical relationship is sacred for me and should be between two people. I said to him that if he wants her, I’ll give him to her. A few days later, he started showing his anger at the invasion of privacy. I know that men hate it when women cannot switch off about an issue in their life and when they mull over things. We had another long discussion & difference of opinion about it recently. I know that he doesn’t open his heart to me – told me that when he did that before, people trampled on it. (Join the club…..but we all have to trust again.)

A man who is 42 and never been married is, by definition, scared to death of any real commitment and there could be a dozen reasons for that. So far you and he are on very different pages and while I do not for one second doubt the sincerity of the words he says to you he has, based on his past experience, whatever that might be, no reason whatsoever to trust you. From his experience of women – and I am making some assumptions based on his inability to commit – why should he? From his point of view it is quite reasonable for him to keep the back door open as it were. This will be buried deep in his unconscious and he is quite right, from his point of view, when he says you are making a mountain of a molehill. I doubt very much that he has any conscious desire to hurt you or cause you pain. Right now it is your attitude that is causing you pain. He is just doing what he is doing. As you accurately say he does not open his heart to you. In his experience women cannot be trusted with that part of him and so far you are not proving that you are any different as you go barging in on a part of his life that he regards as private.

You are seeing him as untrustworthy. Be careful of that and look at the three fingers pointing back at you! You do not trust yourself enough to believe that you can hold on to this man. You are demanding that he do it your way and then it will be OK! Quite reasonable but it is not going to work with this man AS HE IS. Until he does some work you are going to have to do most of the work. Not because he is stupid or in any way ugly – he simply does not know how. At this point you are demanding from him something that is simply beyond his ability to give you. I do not doubt for one minute his sincerity when he agrees to your “conditions” – and he keeps the back door open.

Am I overreacting? Why am I confused? I am awesome and I don’t deserve second best treatment. I love him – passionately so!

Are you overreacting? Dunno and one thing is certain if you continue to react in this way YOU will chase him away and then he will – AGAIN - be able to say “See? Women – you just cannot trust them. Before you know where you are they are checking upon you and accusing you of all sorts of shit!!” Unreasonable? Not from his point of view. His ability to turn anything sexual around and make fun of it, at a moments notice, is a very revealing defense mechanism. Not in any way bad, just revealing.

Work with this. You are NOT getting second best. In my opinion you are getting the very best he can give you AT THIS TIME. You have to decide if that is good enough for you.

Could he work at changing all that stuff. He is going to HAVE to if he ever wants a satisfactory relationship. Point is how far are you willing to go to support him? The old Harlequin question “Is this worth the trouble?” You want him to trust you? Great. However you literally know more than him, because of the work you have done, so it going to have to start with you.

For it me it is not negotiable, if he really wants this relationship, that he also does some work - Harlequin starts next week!!. If he simply won’t then you are probably wasting your time – unless , of course, you are prepared to put up with his behavior. This will be hard work. Can you do it? Of course – but do you want to?

I would please like to know your view on this…

Great to hear from you and please regard this as the beginning not the end, of the conversation.

Christopher

]]> http://www.foundationsa.co.za/blog/2008/08/lies-are-not-always-lies/feed/ http://www.foundationsa.co.za/blog/2008/07/if-you-know-where-we-are-going-please-tell-me/ http://www.foundationsa.co.za/blog/2008/07/if-you-know-where-we-are-going-please-tell-me/#comments Tue, 29 Jul 2008 18:04:43 +0000 christopher http://www.foundationsa.co.za/blog/?p=12 What a large number of the prophecies are saying - and some of these come from a very long time ago and from totally unrelated cultures and backgrounds indeed – is that it is going to be change of a very sudden and very rapid nature in the very near future. Change like that is always disturbing and often has very unpleasant results. The point that there have “prophets of doom” who have predicted the “end of the world”, since time immemorial is perfectly true and there can be justification for dismissing, at least a lot of those predictions, as “crap!”. The difference between those utterances and what is happening today is the diversity of source. It is truly remarkable how such a wide range of cultures that have no relationship with one another at all, are saying essentially the same thing.

This kind of change has happened several times before in our Earth’s history and is pretty well documented. There are the very large craters left by asteroid or meteorite impact in several parts of the world. The biggest of them all is to be found right in our back yard at Vredefort. There is more than enough hard evidence that some of these events almost wiped out life completely. There is the story of the Atlantis disaster. There are many, many versions of this so take your pick (naturally I have my own!). One thing IS sure. Something happened and the effects were, shall we say, dramatic. The story of caves in the Mediterranean area that are full of a vast variety of animal bones that were smashed into a solid mass by a vast mass of water is well documented. The other tale of the carcasses of quick frozen mammoths that are still found in the Siberian permafrost with fresh tropical plants in their mouths is equally well documented. For us to have the idea that this sort of thing simply cannot happen to us is foolish. Mother Earth’s history is littered with the bones, literal and metaphorical, of catastrophic events.

What it boils down to is this – and I will repeat what I always say – do not believe a word that I say, but hear what I say. There is, for me, no doubt that the energies are building to some sort of climax. Precisely what form that climax will take I do not know and frankly I am not sure that it matters. It will be a climax. There is the obvious stuff like global warming and everything that is associated with that. There is a lot of stuff that is not quite so obvious.

Our behaviour as human beings is becoming more frenetic and excessive in every way. Wars, extremism of all kinds, levels of personal abuse, again of all kinds, are all on the increase and it is seemsunlikely that these levels can be sensibly contained. Certainly governments and the other conventional authorities appear quite powerless to do anything sensible.To use a flooding analogy – the banks will burst and seem close to doing just that. We tend to discount the massive levels of electromagnetic radiation that we subject ourselves to and there is more than enough evidence to show that our very DNA is being affected by this radiation. Levels of ADD and related stuff in our children is also on the increase.

Despite the trumpetings of modern medicine overall health levels are not great. We need all the modern drugs to counter stress and other insidious effects of our so-called civilisation to simply keep us going. At this time the only thing that seems to vary is the level of that self same crap I referred to earlier! Interesting times as Confucius is said to have said.