Christophers Blog

Those of you who have attended The Harlequin Experience will remember that one of the ideas that I put forward for consideration is that life is a selfish process. This is not an easy idea to grasp for several reasons. First it cuts right across the ideas of conventional society that one of the greatest thing we can do is – and it is literally chipped in stone on a good number of the war memorials that litter our public gardens – is to give up our lives for others. Second it is a basic tenet of the two fathers of our Protestant religions, Luther and Calvin, that we are not worth much and that we are simply not very important in the greater scheme of things. Essentially they see any attempt to make ourselves important or worthwhile or to even love ourselves in any way as “sinful”.

With just these two foundation stones in place the idea of putting yourself first becomes difficult.

Let us look at the practical implications of always putting someone else first.

How on earth are you going to be able to do something intelligent for anyone else until you are in at least reasonably good order? They tell us this on the airplanes we all use when the airhostess stands in front – sadly these days it is too often a recording- and says “in the unlikely event of a sudden loss of pressure the panel above your head will fall open and an oxygen mask will drop out. Pull it towards you with a sharp jerk, place it over your nose and mouth and MAKE SURE IT IS WORKING PROPERLY BEFORE HELPING OTHERS! You will not be of much use to me or anyone else if you are asphyxiating!

Another of the things we ask you to consider is the idea is that it essential to love yourself before you can even think of saying to someone else “I love you” and in that moment. For us the logic behind this is inescapable. How can you possibly ask someone to love you if you do not love yourself? Why on earth should they bother if you cant?

There is one question that we need to ask ourselves and continue asking ourselves until we can answer it with a resounding YES and it is this:

AM I WORTH THE TROUBLE?

Posted on September 20th, 2011 by christopher
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There is nothing wrong with the concept of forgiveness as such ,what does matter is the energy behind act of forgiveness.

There are two ideas that we need to wrestle with here.

The first is the one expressed in the short story of “The Little Soul” ( you can Google this - wish I had written it and I didn’t) which says that whatever is done to us by someone is done by that person as a support to enable us to achieve whatever we want to achieve in this life. So if you want to experience what it is to forgive then someone has to agree to do something to you so that you can forgive them! From this comes that idea that nothing bad can EVER happen to us! This is not as extraordinary as it sounds. If you work with the idea that whatever happens to us has value or, put differently, is an opportunity for us to learn something, then whatever happens is not some random event. Someone had to do that thing to us – consciously – so that we could have the experience that we have. We can of course hold tight to the 4F syndrome (remember?) and I am not sure of where that leaves us, except at the bottom of a very deep hole. For me the ideas expressed in “The Little Soul” make more than sense.

The second is this.  If nothing bad can ever happen to us then what can there be to forgive? What we need to do is ACCEPT both what happened to us and also the value of the person who caused what happened.

It is our ATTITUDE to what happens that makes it bad not the happening itself.

What we are usually saying when we forgive someone in the traditional way implies that we feel that they are bad or less in some way or another and that they will not really be able to function without our sanction or what we call “forgiveness”.  It gives us what can only be called a perverted sense of “power over”. In a very real sense we take our sense of our own lack of worth or powerlessness and dump it on them. Not very attractive!

Perhaps what we should be doing when someone does something to us which appears to require our “forgiveness” for their “badness” is simply send them flowers (I prefer chocolates!)and thank them for the opportunity they have given us to learn something about ourselves.

Posted on August 19th, 2011 by christopher
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I quite often feature in peoples dreams and I get up to some odd antics. More often than not the dream has little or nothing to do with me and I am nothing more than a symbol of something or another that is going on in the dreamer’s life. However every now and again one pops that seems to not only have relevance for the dreamer but also for me. I have their permission to share this dream with you and also my take on it.

Here is the dream as they told it me: Read more…

Posted on July 25th, 2011 by christopher
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The news item below comes from an emagazine I subscribe to called Gizmag which is presumably a combination of “gizmo” or gadget and magazine. It is full of some really interesting snippets and I came across this one which fairly took my breath away for the sheer breadth and width for that matter, of its arrogance:

“According to the latest statistics, every year approximately 2,500 babies die from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) in the U.S. alone, with thousands more falling victim to it around the world. In typical cases, an infant passes away in their sleep, with no apparent explanation. While various theories have been put forward, the exact cause of SIDS is unknown. While not offering an answer to the mystery, two students from Israel’s Ben-Gurion University of the Negev (BGU) are working on a computer system, that could keep more babies from becoming SIDS statistics.”

Has anyone ever stopped to consider that maybe, just maybe the person(sic) concerned WANTED to leave? The arrogance of our medical system as it goes about prolonging life regardless of the cost both financial and what you might call spiritual is astounding. If our marvellous medical science – and it is marvellous in so many ways – cannot find a medical reason for SIDS then just maybe there is not one? Perhaps it is simply a decision made by another human being that it would be respectful to honour? Find – Google will bring it up – and read a very powerful bit of writing called “The Little Soul”.

In “The Prophet” Khalil Gibran also expresses this very beautifully when he reminds us that it is not our purpose as parents to make our children like us but rather to be the stable bow that enables the arrow (our child) to fly. In other words our parental purpose is to create a space that will enable our children to be who and what they are. And is this not also the real purpose of any relationship –to enable the beloved to realise, make real, who they are?

Posted on July 15th, 2011 by christopher
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It is perhaps not too fanciful to say that our whole financial system is built on the the concept of the Mortgage. After all the whole financial edifice came crashing down when people started defaulting on their mortgage payments and the tsunami like effects of that are still being experienced. The principal behind the concept of the mortgage is simple enough.

To give us the illusion of security we have come to believe that we can “own” a piece of the earth. This is in itself a very odd concept indeed. However it is simple enough to see that this idea likely sprang from the very ancient territorial instincts that all animals seem to have. This instinct gives the animal concerned some protection of its food supply and reproduction rights. This is hardly the case these days and yet on the basis of that ancient drive we have now created a very strange edifice indeed.

This business of ownership appears to have it roots in the idea of “conquest” which is in itself a very odd concept indeed. How do you conquer someone? However having conquered the conqueror “gives” away portions of the “conquered” land to his supporters who are then expected to support him in keeping the conquered territory. They in turn give away smaller bits to others who will support them – and so on and so on. At the bottom of the heap are the ragtail and bobtail – you and me by and large - who are not seen to be worthy of a gift of land and still need somewhere to live and so we offer , forced actually, to “buy” our portion. We are seldom able to pay the price demanded so the “owner” generously (sic) allows us to have the use of the land under the illusion of ownership while we pay it off. In times gone by we paid it off by way of a share of the crops we produced and often in blood if the owner decided to go to war. I am sure that it is too much different today!

The etymology of the word “mortgage” says it all! It comes to us from the old French – “mort” meaning “death” and “gage” meaning “glove” and there we have it – The Glove of Death.

A friend of mine and I were having a conversation the other day and they mentioned that they were intending to buy a home and were looking at the long lists of homes that have been “repossessed” by the banks – interesting idea that – how can you repossess something you never owned in the first place? As they said, there are some “bargains” to be had! I suggested that they be very careful indeed of what they were taking on. Many if not all those homes had been bought by people with good intent of creating a safe place for both themselves and their families. Most of those homes will have echoed with the laughter of children and become imbued with the dreams and hopes of the parents. If you have not been there you can only imagine the real distress and real agony as the bank marches in with its hobnail boots and throws that family out. The Glove of Death takes a strangle hold. I am not sure that I would want to now go and live in such a home of distress.

I do not know what the answer is and it surely cannot be to throw people onto the street. For so long as we continue with the system we shall have distressed people as citizens and that cannot be good for business, our society and everyone else.

Time to change the system. If we do not the price we will have to pay is likely to be beyond our means to pay. Already it is very high indeed!

Posted on July 4th, 2011 by christopher
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I was sitting in the airport in Cape Town recently waiting for my flight to open when I heard a very familiar whistle. Despite its familiarity it was more than a little startling simply because it was so out of place. As I know a reasonable amount about our avifauna it was not difficult to identify as coming from a Red Wing Starling that was swooping around the  departure area and continually coming back to the floor to ceiling windows,  perching on one of the supports, peering longingly through the glass and uttering that rather forlorn whistle cross chirrup that is one of their signature calls. Read more…

Posted on June 21st, 2011 by christopher
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That your deal with them is strictly one-sided. Whether they were aware of it or not the protocol requires them to do their best to support you in the fulfilment of your game plan. It is they who need to learn how to do that. Ignorance of the protocol is no excuse and will not free them from the results of failing in their stated (even if only implied) and willingly assumed task of providing you with food, shelter, education and above all else an example that is worthwhile following. All that is required of you is to be whom and what you are. The reality is that there is very little else that you can do. For quite a while your freedom of action is severely circumscribed by your physical limitations. You cannot really take on the world for quite a while and neither can you express what your desires are or what your point of view is in any really coherent way. You simply do not have the vocabulary. It can be argued that this is pretty much the state of affairs until you attain majority. Man-made laws support this idea in some way or another and while the age varies slightly from society to society we have all sorts of legal and other limitations until we do attain the age of majority. The ball for the game that you are all playing is very much in their court, not yours.  The difficulty comes when they fail or at best fall short on what they actually undertook to do. You pretty much have to simply handle whatever they throw your way and all that you have in order to do that is the scraps you picked up from them. This pretty much throws you back on your own considerable resources and fortunately you are very well equipped. So despite the fact that while it seems safe to say that the relationship between you and you parents is quite unique in that it is completely one-sided and you are in many ways on your own all is not lost. So get busy!

Posted on June 14th, 2010 by christopher
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It is an open invitation

1. That you owe them nothing. However that does not mean that in the interest of having a good relationship there are not certain things it is clever to do. It is true that they extended a pretty general invitation by creating a body for take over by anyone whom it suited and wanted to get on with their personal game plan. The question of whether or not you feel you could give them a “tip” or “gratuity” in some form or another for creating the opportunity for you is entirely up to you. Read more…

   Posted on May 21st, 2010 by christopher
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We talk often about the alchemical process that is life so it might be well to examine what we mean when we talk of Alchemy. Usually it is associated with old men with long beards in mysterious book-filled laboratories, surrounded by strange equipment and very busy trying to turn lead into gold. Likely with an owl as the symbol of wisdom perched somewhere in the background. This, sadly, has lead to alchemy being discredited as something more than a little off the wall and not to be taken too seriously.

This is a pity because Alchemy is where modern chemistry has its roots and it is safe to say that without the learning and discoveries of those early alchemists we would not have chemistry today. In fact we could go even further and say that despite the wonders that modern chemistry is capable of, alchemy can be regarded as superior in many ways. One thing that chemistry does not take into account and it is today being recognised as a vital factor in the world of quantum physics and that is the actual physical presence of the chemist. Alchemists recognised fully the importance of the environment in any reaction – and that included the nature, temperament and state of personal development of the alchemist. Perhaps if more recognition were given this today, we would not have so many chemicals that can only be called bad! The old alchemists, would I suspect, be appalled at some of the stuff coming out of our modern laboratories. We have fallen into a most dangerous and seductive trap – because, as human beings, we CAN do something, we believe that we MAY.

The word alchemy has an interesting etymology. It is Arabic in origin as one would expect as the science has come down to us via Arab scholars. The prefix “Al” meaning simply “of” or “from”. The “chem” part is an ancient Egyptian word – predating the Arabic that is spoken in that country today - and means “the black land”. This is a reference to the annual flooding that took place when the Nile deposited quantities of the life-giving black mud that it brought down from central Africa. This was a truly transformative process that brought life back to Egypt and allowed that country to achieve the pre-eminent position it held in ancient times. With the construction of the Aswan Dam this process no longer happens.

The operative word here is “transformative” and it is this process that so fascinated the alchemists. Did some of them concern themselves to attempting to turn lead into gold? No doubt and it is interesting that atomically there is not that much difference between lead and gold and they are often found in close association with each other. There is more than a little evidence to suggest that some of them may even have succeeded. Perhaps - and we need not bother ourselves here with the reality or otherwise of that – you could have a fascinating time exploring that aspect yourself. If you wish to pursue this I suggest you make a start with the works of a much misunderstood, intellectual giant of the Middle Ages, Paracelsus.

Certainly Paracelsus and other were fascinated by the straightforward chemical processes that could be set in motion by the combination of a variety of substances. This process resulted in the amazing appearance of totally new substances. Much as we do today in our hi-tech laboratories. What really interested the serious alchemist however was how this transformative process could be applied to the human psyche. It was this latter thinking that caught Dr. C. G. Jung’s attention and he devoted a great deal of time and intellectual energy to the unravelling of the language of ancient alchemical treatises into the language of modern psychology.

One of the most important pieces of equipment in the alchemist’s laboratory was the alembic. This was the container or still in which the chemical process were contained and took place. The operative word is “container” and just as no sensible process can take place in the laboratory without a suitable container or alembic so it is with our lives.

These days there is a lot of talk about the necessity of having definable goals and the validity of this cannot sensibly be disputed. Equally we all know that, too often, once we have achieved a goal it often no longer appears to have the value that it seemed when we set out. Why? We need to take the process of goal setting a step further. Unless the goals are contained in the alembic or the personal Vision we have for our lives then the goals we set will be neither satisfying nor useful for the simple reason that they will not be truly relevant and will therefore add little value to our lives.

This is one of the great challenges that face all of us. What is our alembic or to use a more modern term what is your Vision for your life?

Posted on March 25th, 2010 by christopher
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For so long as we see God, Allah, Jehovah, Brahma,Life – call it what you will – as somehow separate from us,  a No-thing, that we have to work hard at having a relationship with,  we make a mock of the concept that we have thrust at us on a daily basis – THAT GOD ( and all the other words that we use) IS PART OF US AND WE ARE PART OF GOD.  If I am part of that God and that god is part of me, then there is no separateness and therefore there can be no relationship to work on. What I do have to work at is simply expressing that divinity of which we are all a part and which is in each and every one of us. For so long as I feel that I have to work at the relationship with God then I deny the promise contained in the words of Jesus of Nazareth at John 10:34 “Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are Gods?” and again at 10:38 “that the Father is in me and I in him”.
We are surrounded at every level with the effects of this belief in the separateness of God/Life from us. The planet that is our home is rapidly becoming less and less habitable and less suitable to our purposes as heap abuse after abuse on Mother Nature. We no longer see ourselves  as part of Mother Nature. There is also more than a little evidence to suggest that the very fabric of our society is also beginning to unravel as we heap abuse after abuse on each other. We have also lost our sense of community.  I like to feel that we would not be doing to the planet what we are doing if we simply saw the planet as part of the same God/Life as we are. I like to feel that we would simply not treat those that look and believe different to us in the way that we do, if we saw them also, as part of the same God/Life as we are. Surely we would not be that stupid? I am afraid we are! A school boy who is just approaching puberty, came back to his parents, whom I know, in a state of shock after his teacher in Religious Studies had told him that a Buddhist Monk would surely burn in the Christian hell for his beliefs! It would seem we are that stupid! Sadly we are seeing a great deal of this type of thinking where if a thought process or belief differs from yours then that other person must be killed – in the name of God!
Is the answer too frightening for the Churches? – and I am also speaking of the Jewish and the Muslim “churches” though I am very aware they do not have the same formality of structure as the Christians.  Are they afraid that if we actually realised that we all have to do is be the Divinity that we already are, then a great deal of the structure that they have created would become obsolete and unnecessary? The way for us to realise – make real - that Divinity can only be through us and our own introspection and effort and not because of the interference of any outside agency however well intentioned. Do they fear that this would then make them superfluous? Would it really? Perhaps all they would need to do is change their roles in our lives.   Priest, Rabbis, Mullahs would then rather become facilitators to support us in calling forth what is already latent in us rather than attempting  to beat us into the shape they feel is required  by some dogma or another. This is the real meaning of the word education – to call forth. And is this not what God wants? For us to simply be as Marianne Williamson says:
“ brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” (Marianne Williamson)

Posted on March 25th, 2010 by christopher
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